On any given week, my husband and I attend a half dozen educational seminars on topics related to aging\u2014Alzheimer\u2019s, financial planning, safety at home, etc. We go as professionals wanting to learn more about our field and to meet others doing similar work, but most of the content is really intended for families and individuals wanting to learn more about caring for their loved ones. These seminars always teach us something new, are at all times of the day, cost nothing, and usually come with great food, but I\u2019m always surprised by how few family members actually attend.<\/p>\n
On one hand, it makes me scratch my head. Caring for aging parents (or grandparents or brothers or aunts) is a largely unchartered territory for most of us, and it\u2019s a territory filled with questions and uncertainty. So, why wouldn\u2019t people jump at the chance to learn more?<\/p>\n
But then I think back to the times when we ourselves were going through this as a family and I realize we never attended any learning seminars either. When we\u2019re in the moment, even though we may feel lost and unsupported, we often don\u2019t seek out the help we need. We all come up with a million excuses for why not to go or why not to seek help. Excuses like:<\/p>\n
I don\u2019t know when the support groups or seminars are.<\/strong> This is an excuse that I think is justified. Unless you\u2019re in the senior care world, you may not know all the groups and opportunities that are available locally. To find out, the senior centers in Swampscott<\/a> and Marblehead<\/a> are a good place to start. They have their own offerings and may be able to point you to others.<\/p>\n Another great place to ask are our local assisted living and skilled care facilities. Almost all offer their own educational talks and support groups. These aren\u2019t sales pitches; they often feature outside experts and unique content that will greatly help you in your role as partner or caregiver. Bertram House of Swampscott<\/a> offers an Alzheimer\u2019s support group and talks on various subjects, as do other local facilities.<\/p>\n A little farther away in Danvers, Seasons<\/a> (a memory care facility) does a number of talks on Alzheimer\u2019s (I attended a great one last week). Care Dimensions<\/a> (formerly Hospice of the North Shore) offers programs on a regular basis all over the North Shore. Again, all are free and most are accompanied by food\u2014all you have to do is call to find out when they are. We are lucky to live in an area with a wealth of resources. Once you start asking what\u2019s available, you\u2019ll be amazed by what\u2019s here.<\/p>\n I don\u2019t have time to go. <\/strong>On one hand, this is probably true. Most family caregivers juggle jobs, kids, social obligations, and life in general, in addition to caring for a loved one. You may feel like you can\u2019t fit one more thing on your too-full plate, but I promise you the tips and knowledge you\u2019ll gain from just one good seminar or support group will save you time back in the real world of caring for your loved one.<\/p>\n I don\u2019t need \u201csupport,\u201d I need solutions. <\/strong>Support groups are inaccurately named. Yes, they provide a supportive environment for you to express your thoughts and concerns, but it\u2019s not just a bunch of people sitting in a circle talking about what bugs them. You\u2019re surrounded by others wearing similar shoes, and many of them have likely had the same struggles you\u2019re having. What\u2019s better than talking to one person who has already researched and solved a problem you\u2019re having? Sitting in a room with 6 to 10 people who\u2019ve done that (you\u2019ll get 10 times the knowledge).<\/p>\n Probably the main reason people don\u2019t seek help is the same reason we didn\u2019t\u2014denial. Attending a program titled \u201cCaring for Someone with Alzheimer\u2019s,\u201d or going to a support group for Parkinson\u2019s caregivers puts a label on your life and forces you to face what\u2019s really happening. When we\u2019re in the thick of it\u2014struggling to adjust to being a caregiver rather than spouse, mourning the loss of the life we had, trying to figure out how we can make it all work\u2014it\u2019s normal to avoid settings that force us to sit down and come to terms with where we\u2019re at. Walking in the door of a support group or educational meeting can be hard, but once you\u2019re there, I promise you won\u2019t regret going. Rather than confirming for you just how bad things are, it might actually give you hope for how things can be better.<\/p>\n Molly Rowe owns FirstLight Home Care with her husband, Steve Rowe, and lives in Swampscott with their two sons. FirstLight provides non-medical in-home care to adults in Swampscott, Marblehead, Nahant, Lynn, Salem, Peabody, Danvers, Beverly, and Lynnfield. For more information and help caring for your loved ones in the comfort of their own homes, please visit FirstLight\u2019s website at <\/em>www.salem.firstlighthomecare.com<\/em><\/a> or contact Molly at <\/em>781-691-5755\/mrowe@firstlighthomecare.com<\/em><\/a><\/p>\n <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" On any given week, my husband and I attend a half dozen educational seminars on topics related to aging\u2014Alzheimer\u2019s, financial planning, safety at home, etc. We go as professionals wanting to learn more about our field and to meet others doing similar work, but most of the content is really…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[12,14,18],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-634","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-alzheimers","category-caring-for-aging-parents","category-end-of-life"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.firstlighthomecare.com\/home-healthcare-salem\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/634","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.firstlighthomecare.com\/home-healthcare-salem\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.firstlighthomecare.com\/home-healthcare-salem\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.firstlighthomecare.com\/home-healthcare-salem\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.firstlighthomecare.com\/home-healthcare-salem\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=634"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.firstlighthomecare.com\/home-healthcare-salem\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/634\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.firstlighthomecare.com\/home-healthcare-salem\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=634"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.firstlighthomecare.com\/home-healthcare-salem\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=634"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.firstlighthomecare.com\/home-healthcare-salem\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=634"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}