Even “responsible drinking” can be dangerous as we age.
You don’t hear much about alcohol abuse in seniors. Not because it doesn’t exist but because most of us don’t want to talk about it publically or because we don’t see the abuse.
Alcohol was a major factor in the last years of my father-in-law’s life. He was lonely, depressed, and in pain, and a glass of wine or an evening cocktail was often the one part of the day he truly enjoyed. Unfortunately, he was also on a bunch of medications and unsteady on his feet, and a drink could (and did) have dire consequences. He had several serious falls the last years of his life, including one where he broke his arm, and we would usually find a glass of wine somewhere near the accident scene.
It’s a lot easier to hide problem drinking as we age. We might go out less or have fewer obligations. No one notices if we have trouble getting up in the morning or stumble a little when we walk. Many of the common characteristics of alcohol abuse—falls, dementia, insomnia, depression, loss of appetite—are also indicative of aging so we chalk these problems up to age, not drinking.
Even “responsible drinking” can become dangerous with age because the way we handle alcohol changes. You may feel drunk on fewer drinks than when you were younger. Or it could be your one glass of wine with dinner interacts with the medications you’re on or makes you unsteady on your feet. Alcohol can make existing conditions like osteoporosis, diabetes, and dementia worse, and it can dull pain that would warn of something serious like a heart attack.
Looking back on the last years with my father-in-law, I think his life would have been fuller and easier without alcohol. He’d likely have had fewer falls and fewer hospital stays. He probably would have eaten better and been more motivated to take care of himself. Our visits would have been better, and he even might have lived longer.
As caregivers and adult children, most of us want our aging loved ones to live full lives doing as many of the things they did when they were younger as possible. We might be tempted to say, “So what if he drinks a martini at night or has a few beers during the Pats game? He’s earned it,” or “His doctor recommends he drink red wine.” We might even argue that drinking improves his quality of life. Chances are, it doesn’t.
Drinking alcohol does not count as a hobby, an interest, or a purpose. If you really want your loved one to live a full life as he ages, help him to fill his days—not his glass.
Molly Rowe owns FirstLight Home Care with her husband, Steve Rowe, and lives in Swampscott with their two sons. FirstLight provides non-medical in-home care to adults in Swampscott, Marblehead, Nahant, Lynn, Salem, Peabody, Danvers, Beverly, and Lynnfield. For more information and help caring for your loved ones in the comfort of their own homes, please visit FirstLight’s website at www.salem.firstlighthomecare.com or contact Molly at 781-691-5755/[email protected]
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