Caring
for Aging Parents

You’re Not as Good a Listener as You Think

[caption id="attachment_530" align="alignnone" width="279"] Whether your 3 or 83, listening can be hard.[/caption] As I write this, I know most people won’t read it. The same person who wants practical tips on organizing medications, avoiding falls, and taking care of a loved one with Alzheimer’s will likely skip over the most practical tip of all: Be a good listener. Why? Because we all think we’re pretty good listeners. We know to sit patiently, try not to interrupt too much, nod at the appropriate times. The funny thing is most of us (and I include myself in this) aren’t great listeners even...

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What to do when you’re not the caregiver

Most of what I usually write is for people taking care of aging loved ones. But what if you’re not the main person taking care of a loved one? Sometimes, not being the caregiver is just as hard. It’s a common scenario. Mom has dementia, Dad has his own health issues, Dad insists on taking care of Mom, and he won’t accept outside help. Maybe he’s handling everything himself and it’s a disaster or maybe he’s handling everything and it’s working out, but either way, you know it’s a ticking time bomb. Eventually he’ll burn out or get hurt or...

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The Power of Music

When I was little, I’d lock myself in my room with a million Barbies and listen to this one record of kids songs over and over and over again. When I was pregnant with my first son, I was determined to find that record and I did (on CD), which my kids now play on “Repeat.” It doesn’t matter that it’s about 40 years later and I’m a mom of two, living in a different state. When I hear that CD, I’m immediately back in my old bedroom, smelling my mom’s spaghetti, trying to cram Barbie’s foot into a pair...

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Don’t Delay Getting Help For Hearing Loss

[caption id="attachment_150" align="alignnone" width="225"] Dad's typical "out to eat" face -- unable to hear a word of the conversation.[/caption] My father spent most of his teen and early adult years on a boat. First on a lobster boat, then in the engine room of a research ship stationed off New Zealand, then on a lobster boat again. Boats and the water are in his blood. Unfortunately, they’re also in his ears. Decades of roaring engines have had a major impact on his hearing. When we go to a loud restaurant, I’ll watch his eyes glaze over as we chatter around...

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Reining in Your Medications

After my husband’s father passed away in 2013, we were faced with the daunting task of cleaning out his house. Steve’s sister handled most of the clean-out since she lived in Florida near where his home had been, but we did a preliminary clean during our last visit. One of our tasks was getting rid of the medicines. When I say task, I mean TASK. We’re not talking about three or four pill bottles neatly arranged in a cabinet. There were shelves, drawers, baskets, tables filled with medications. We knew Dad’s medication system had some shortcomings, but I’m not sure...

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